Early one frigid Sunday morning, two young boys are playing ice hockey on Frog Pond when a rabid Rottweiler charges one of them. Thinking quickly, the other boy jams the blade of his hockey stick under the dogs collar and twists it, snapping the dog's neck instantly.
A reporter from the Boston Herald runs up. "Young man, I saw the brave thing you did. I'm going to take your picture and put it up in tomorrow's page 1! "Young Bruins fan saves friend from rabid beast."
The boy looks right at him. "But I'm not a Bruins fan."
"Oh, well... 'sox fan protects park visitors, saves friend."
Again, the boy shakes his head. "I don't like the Red Sox, either. I'm a Yankees fan."
The headline on Monday's paper: "Little bastard kills beloved family pet."
OPEN THREAD: Just do it.
51 minutes ago