Carnival! (NSFW)

Well, it's another long midwatch, and like it seems to do every damn day this year, it's raining. Again.

 So, with dampened spirits dragging me down, I thought I'd share some pictures from Brazil's Carnival to brighten up everyone's day. Lord knows I feel better already.

think warm thoughts (SFW version)

Welp, we're snug in a lay berth, tucked up in Brooklyn until the overnight tomorrow. Ice all around us, and it's two degrees out, so even though there's shore access, my ass is probably staying in today.

 With such cold-ass weather all around us, let's turn our eyes south to the warmth of lovely Rio De Janeiro, and some lovely Brazilian ladies.

Let us rejoice! it's finally here!

Well, this is a fine, fine day, isn't it?  Today is Ash Wednesday, but to you non-Catholics out there, it's also a day to celebrate, too. You see, Carnival ended last night in Rio De Janeiro, and as we all know, I have a weakness for Brazilian women, and Carnival is when they take to the streets and be all in costumes and half-naked, or all naked, sometimes.

 And I've got the pictures to share, so here are a few safe for work pictures to get you started. More coming in the days and weeks ahead... especially in the next few days, as I want to drive up traffic, uh, share these pictures and the smiles they bring.So stay tuned. 2015 was incredibly hot in Brazil this year, which means that the costumes were kept to a glorious minimum.

 Disclaimer: As beautiful as these women are, I am happy that Inappropriately Hot Foreign Wife was never a samba dancer. The internet is forever, and so are photographs of all these bundas gostosas.

Very important news of global concern

Perhaps one of the single greatest challenges facing Brazil today, and of absolutely first concern, judging by the attention paid to the issue, is the judging of just which woman has the nicest bottom in the country famed and appreciated for their women's devotion to having nice bottoms.

 To act as an information clearinghouse and promote quality bottom-looking-at judging ability, Brazil formed the Miss Bumbum committee, a guild of selfless, professional bum-lookers dedicated to being able to who gots the best bottom.

 Think I'm waxing poetic? You have no idea what these poor, dedicated men have to go through. Forget being a Vegas oddsmaker, THESE are the guys who have to deal with a mountain of minutia and the ability to pick up on near-invisible cues when judging many, many butts out there where the difference between one and sundry is almost invisible to the human eye.

 So, in proving my point, here are the Miss Bumbum contestants we're talking about.

Brazilian swimwear (mostly NSFW, which is awesome)

Well, as reader Daniel pointed out, folks do appreciate my appreciation for the Brazilian Female Form.

 And tomorrow is also the day Inappropriately Hot Foreign Wife comes home grumpy, as it's Wax Day, when Brazilian women suffer 2 hours of indignity and pain in the name of smooth skin and not looking like they're smuggling Chewbacca in their bathing suits. It's as fine as time to be stuck on a boat far from home as any.

 So let's look today at what passes for swimwear in Brazil... the ever-popular and much beloved Brazilian bathing suit, which gets sold and can be stored in standard sized test tubes.

Brazil and the 2014 'World Cups" (NSFW)

My wife and kid had to rush out to buy their Team Brasil soccer shirts before we moved, in anticipation of the cup games.

 But, sadly, not every lovely Brazilian lady can afford a team jersey, and of those that can, many find them awful hot in the Brazilian sun. Let's look at how they work around that. You know, for informational purposes.