In Which I Solve Problems to Everyone's Satisfaction

As you may have heard, there was recent publicity  around an unskilled yet opinionated writer's assertion that women's plumbing supplies (tampons, pads and that sort of thing) should be subsidized by the Gubmint, as they were a basic human right because feelings.

 You can read a more exacting and thoughtful synopsis here.

"We need to move beyond the stigma of “that time of the month” – women’s feminine hygiene products should be free for all, all the time."



 I dunno. This is what I hear. 

 Anyhow, I have a solution. 

  Look at the surface area of the average pad or tampon. Plenty of surface area.   So you sell off advertising space, and using hypoallergenic ink, Stayfree and Co. can write off transport costs, AND IT WON'T COST TAXPAYER DOLLARS to do so. 

 Anyhow, what a shame, to let all that marketable advertising space go to waste. Think about it. Everyone's going to get on board, because it's for the children, or something. 

I can see it now:

"Trust Dr. Scholls"
"Radio Shack: We're still a thing."
"If you can read this, you could be reading COSMO"
"Brought to you by Disney."


Problem solved.