God damn, I'm tired of these incessant articles on manhood and manliness, and why it's all bad.
I didn't link to any of those articles, because most of those assholes masturbate furiously to their sitemeter, so... fuck them, you know? I don't want to send them traffic, I just want to illustrate that there's a lot of women and men who want to be women (and men who want to be real men) who loathe, and self-loathe with furious abandon, the concept of traditional masculinity.
Just... stop that shit, please.
If you don't know whether or not you're manly enough, you aint.
If you need someone else to validate your self-opinion, you aint a man, either.
I'm not going to pontificate here. And you're welcome. It's time to stop this shit.
People at work are occasionally surprised when I let slip some personal information and they realize that I'm actually a fairly sensitive, well-read and educated person. At work, that's not often what I project, and that's fine. I'm a voracious reader. Couple of books a week if I can get them. I'm a re-reader, too. I've been re-reading Moby Dick and Saint Augustine's "The City of God", for years, because I get more out of it as I've matured. Phenomenally nuanced stuff. Fuckin' magical. Plus, the story of the fall of Rome is more poignant today for us than in any time in recent memory.
I'm vulgar and crude, not ignorant. I used to not be like that. It was an affectation when I quit being a biologist and started fishing full time. Eventually it wasn't an affectation anymore. My old roommate Johnny Sparks, an ironworker and business owner, used to introduce me as "My friend Paul. He studies crab balls and shit like that." It was sea urchin gonadal tissue that I was studying, not crab balls, but you get the idea. Eventually it made me laugh every time he said that. At first I was kinda hurt.
At any rate, my wife bitches sometimes that I'm overly masculine, sometimes a caricature of masculinity. I point out that she married me, and not one of the sensitive, soft-handed weepy Pajama Boys that she extols at times... and that's a fine life-lesson there: what women desire is a far cry from what women say they want.
My own opinion, men should be able to look another man in the eye as equals and peers, whether they or your are flipping burgers, President of the US, Albert Einstein or Larry the Cable Guy. I figure if you're a self-aware person and you can talk to another man without the urge to condescend or gush, you're most of the way there.
Am I there? I think so. I mean, it's a lifelong journey to go from here to the grave, so every man is a work in progress. I can stand among most any group and be unashamed of my masculinity. I've certainly been attacked for it, in my post-college days when I still had peers, mostly female, who were perpetual students and 'finding' themselves amidst social studies and other professional grade grievance mongering trades... most of whom, 20 years later, apparently still searching, from what I hear.
Well, whatever. Despite their disappointment, none of that matters. Women no more can help men find themselves as men qua men as Bruce Jenner can become a woman by mainlining estrogen and slapping on a pair of store-boughts. We're complementary in our traditional gender roles, not selectively hermaphroditic. For those poor souls with genetic or behavioral issues that preclude them from finding a place among men despite their desire, it's probably a fairly nebulous distinction, but they're not going to find a place, however much their desire or fitness may scream for it.
And that's sort of a shame, isn't it? Men operate best in a competitive environment where the rising tide lifts all boats. The competitive environment in which we most thrive, where we establish dominance hierarchies and lift each other up, is viewed as 'toxic' and something to be avoided in modern culture because inclusion is as much controlled by genetic fitness as behavior. If that isn't a war on men, I don't know what is.
Well, fuck it. I'm in an isolated environment, admittedly, here on the floating HQ. None of that awful PC shit reaches us.No 'Code of conduct' beyond common sense and being able to get along with people in close quarters in high-pressure situations. No giving a shit about a man because of his skin color or class, either, really. Racism doesn't work too well out here.
3 minutes ago